It defines you. The
guilt over powers and dictates your life. It is that one thing.
That one thing you
wish was not a part of you. You promised yourself you were done. The words it will never happen again so often
tumble out of your mouth as an empty promise. You wish that to be true, but you
do not believe it is possible. You desperately long for the day it is not a
part of your life, but looking ahead, no finish line is in sight. At the time, it seemed like the only way,
even though you know you had a choice. Sometimes choosing the wrong is easier
than what is right.
It is that one thing
that sits in your mind and gibes the core of which you are as a person. The
reflection of you in the mirror seems distorted and it feels hopeless to find
beauty staring back. It defines you. When people look at you, you assume it is
how they define who you are as well. If given a chance, it would be erased from
the past, present, and future.
That one thing which
gives you a pit in the stomach and make you feel you nauseous thinking about
it. Why me is the question pondered
frequently. No one will understand or
care is the lie your heart listens to daily.
That one thing is
what makes you feel worthless and unloved. Hiding from God is natural because
why or how could God love me if this is a part of who I am? It makes you think
less of who you are and the potential you hold.
If only [ ]…then [ ] taunts from your thoughts.
Fear dominates at the
idea of anyone finding out because then that…is how they will define you as
well. It is already bad enough because it defines and controls you.
You feel hopeless
because it is so much easier to beat yourself up than look at the truth. The
truth that destroys all fears and brings freedom from darkness.
The truth says:
God is there. God
celebrates the small steps. He does not expect perfection, only progress. He
becomes ecstatic each time you turn to him instead of that one thing. There is
victory in the small. God does not define you by that one thing. Let me repeat
that, the Creator of the Earth who holds all of the power in the world-looks at
you and sees his child. God loves
without condition.
No person is perfect.
Every person has that one thing; you, the person two feet away from you, and
the person on the polar end of the world. Everyone is broken. The brokenness is
what makes you beautiful because it lets God put it back. So no matter what
comes to mind as that one thing. Know it does not define because only God can. God
is pursuing you all the time with his arms wide open.
So that one thing? The guilt and shame? Psh,
you have a God that makes you whiter than snow.
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| http://speakingofrealestate.blogs.realtor.org/files/2011/06/7ds.jpg |
xoxo, Han
